Speaker 1: You’re listening to The Night Side with Barb DiGiulio on NewsTalk 1010.
Barb DiGiulio: Welcome back to the show. Great to have you along, and a very happy Valentine’s day to everybody. And as I’ve been saying, you might be with someone tonight, you might be hanging out with your animal watching some Netflix. We’re here for you, and it’s great to have you along, and thank you so much for hanging out with us here on The Night Side. Special guest in studio, and we haven’t seen him for a while, Dr. Stephen Mulholland, he is the founder of SpaMedica and one of Canada’s top cosmetic plastic surgeons. Welcome back to the show.
Dr. Stephen M: Thank you, Barbara. I’m looking forward to a Valentine’s discussion of surgery.
Barb DiGiulio: Well, and thank you for the lovely heart pillow that you and your wife Ann brought for me, and we’re going to be bringing in a little bit later on in the show. That was very thoughtful.
Dr. Stephen M: Thank you. It’s a heart to heart talk.
Barb DiGiulio: Yes, it certainly is. You guys had your Valentine’s dinner?
Dr. Stephen M: Yeah, we went to Lee’s on King Street, and it was a nice, tasty menu. It was beautiful. It was very romantic of course.
Barb DiGiulio: You are in peak physical condition.
Dr. Stephen M: Yes, I was a little bit chubby and I worked, worked, worked. Ate a lot of simple carbohydrates, and I became motivated to get back in shape. I used to play professional hockey, so I’m familiar with that feeling, but it had been several decades, to be honest, since I didn’t get short of breath just walking out of my car.
Barb DiGiulio: So, how are you feeling? Do you feel better than you felt in a long time?
Dr. Stephen M: Oh, I really feel great. I haven’t felt this good since, jeez, it was 1984, and there was Flock of Seagulls, Martha and and the Muffins. No, yeah, I feel great, and I thought I was quite productive, and I was, but now I’m even more productive. And I feel I have so much more energy, and so that’s just basic nutritional common sense. My wife’s a gluten free vegan, so I just kind of follow what she eats and a modicum of physical fitness, and yeah, I’m feeling really great.
Barb DiGiulio: Wow, good for you, that’s amazing. And so what, I guess I was gonna say the main-
Dr. Stephen M: A little self liposuction, too, of course though.
Barb DiGiulio: The main change in your diet, but if you’ve gone vegan, that would be a big one.
Dr. Stephen M: Well, I didn’t go vegan because I still eat some meat, but a lot of complex carbohydrates. I basically cut out simple carbs, kind of paleo-esque without … I’m not prescribed to follow that diet, I just made a focused decision to eat disciplined and with purpose, and it’s been a six month journey. We have a triathlon coming up, so I’m trying to get in shape for that.
Barb DiGiulio: Amazing, good for you. And how are things in the cosmetic surgery world these days?
Dr. Stephen M: Booming. Last year was the busiest year on record in North America for my practice personally, and I would imagine most busy plastic surgeons. And in North America, we’ve become really a culture of self actualization, whether it’s being the best you can be in diet and exercise or pursuing a job you want, and looking the way you want. It’s become less about guilt and vanity and more about just self actualizing. If you want to look a certain way and you’ve tried everything, most people don’t feel that there’s a lot of taboo around it. And a lot of it is nonsurgical.
Barb DiGiulio: Oh, that’s interesting.
Dr. Stephen M: And of course, just the rise of the Millennial. The Millennials have embraced plastic-
Barb DiGiulio: They’re all about it, right?
Dr. Stephen M: It’s crazy. It’s like a religion. It’s like they’ve seen their mothers reluctantly dive into Botox and fillers and wait till they’re in their late 40s or 50s, and they said, “No way, I’m just not gonna get old.” Whether it’s because they exist on dating apps and they get left and right swiped so quickly they want to make a right swipe cosmetic decision, or it’s just the job market is difficult and they want to make sure they look refreshed and rested. I think it’s sometimes an unhealthy predisposition, and you’ve gotta be cautious, select the right surgeon, the right facility. And I mean, you need to be cautious. It’s not like you’re gonna be picking out a coat or a jacket with a retail decision walking out. There are some risks, but it’s an industry full of many options that aren’t always surgical.
Barb DiGiulio: 416-872-1010, text us at 7-1010. Dr. Mulholland is here for the hour, and he is taking your calls and answering your questions. Oh, we just lost her. I was just gonna go, we had someone on the line. She was waiting very, very patiently. She wanted to ask about liposuction, but let me ask you. Because you’re talking about Millennials, and I was going to ask if cosmetic plastic surgery, all the different procedures, are more accessible. But as you were explaining that, I feel like the stigma is dropping away.
Dr. Stephen M: Really, because of the growth and explosion of nonsurgical options, surgery still has a little bit of taboo.
Barb DiGiulio: Okay.
Dr. Stephen M: Not so much as it used to, but you know, not many women are saying, “Hey, look at my facelift scars.”
Barb DiGiulio: Right.
Dr. Stephen M: But a little bit of Botox, some soft tissue fillers, laser hair removal, nonsurgical fat destruction. 82%, last year there was $15 billion spent in North America on cosmetic enhancement, including skincare. And 82% of that $15 billion is just spending things on nonsurgical experiences. So, you could say, “I’m never doing surgery. I don’t really believe in that kind of risk or recovery,” but you could be doing noninvasive enhancements. Look a little fresher, a little trimmer, a little firmer, a little smoother, a little less hairy for the rest of your life, and never have to do surgery.
Barb DiGiulio: All right, Jessica is back on the line. Hi Jessica, welcome to the show.
Jessica: Hi, thank you.
Barb DiGiulio: Go ahead with your question.
Jessica: Okay. I am about 25 pounds overweight, and last, or two years ago, I had lipo for a double chin. And I didn’t really notice any difference after it, and I was just wondering, if that doesn’t work, can I try that again? Or, is there another route that I can take that maybe might get me some better results?
Dr. Stephen M: That’s a great question, Jessica. Now, were you at the same weight when you had your double chin lipo done?
Jessica: The same weight as I am now.
Dr. Stephen M: And you haven’t put on or lost weight, but you didn’t see much difference?
Jessica: No, I didn’t. I’m at the same weight, yeah. I look the same.
Dr. Stephen M: And so you still have a bit of a double chin.
Jessica: Exactly, yes.
Dr. Stephen M: Okay, and so that’s very common to have a double chin or a bit of a two snack, no right angle definition. And what’s happened is, the fat that you hoped could have been lipoed is living under a muscle in your neck called the platysma, and it’s a submuscular fat deposit. And in those circumstances, generally a clinical exam can often pick it up, but sometimes not. Sometimes, you do the lipo and you go, “Damn, my neck is still kind of obtuse.” And that’s because it’s living a bit deeper, and it requires, under local anesthesia, a little incision about an inch long in that crease under our chin. And the surgeon would open up the muscle compartment and with a pair of scissors, surgically remove it. And that would give you the neck you’re looking for, ’cause you likely have sub platysmal, under the muscle fat.
Dr. Stephen M: Okay?
Jessica: Is that about the same price as lipo, or is that a lot more?
Dr. Stephen M: It is a bit more because it takes more surgery. It takes about an hour and 15 minutes versus 45 minutes for a lipo.
Dr. Stephen M: But it’s very affordable, meaning that most submental lipectomies are gonna cost you in that $5000 to $8000 range, which is twice what submental lipo will cost. But if you’re really looking for a right angle neck, it sounds like you don’t have much of a choice.
Jessica: Exactly. Okay, well thank you.
Barb DiGiulio: All right, Jessica. Thanks a lot for the call.
Dr. Stephen M: Thanks.
Barb DiGiulio: That’s interesting. I know someone else who had a similar procedure, and same thing. They said they didn’t notice a difference.
Dr. Stephen M: Yeah. So, it was just that the suction was performed, just in the wrong compartment. And you can’t really suck safely under the muscle, so we suck under the skin. And at the end of that suction, you may have a quarter of an inch gone, but you still have a chubby neck. There’s a huge fat compartment under the muscle.
Barb DiGiulio: And does that pull out in one piece?
Dr. Stephen M: Yeah, it’s really cool. You can see it on YouTube. If you’re really into Dexter season one, it’s kind of like that, a little local.
Barb DiGiulio: Oh, okay, okay.
Dr. Stephen M: And you lift the muscle up, quite delectate, and it just comes out. It’s like you’re delivering. It’s like some sort of OBGYN ward, you’re delivering this little thing like a Ridley Scott alien movie, and out comes this little glob of fat, and that’s your double chin.
Barb DiGiulio: All right, 416-872-1010. Text us at 7-1010. Dr. Stephen Mulholland is here, we’ve got him for the hour. We’re gonna be taking your calls, anything to do with any kind of cosmetic procedure, he is the person to talk to. You are listening to The Night Side.
Welcome back to The Night Side. Great to have you along, and happy Valentine’s Day. We’re here with Dr. Stephen Mulholland. He is the founder of SpaMedica, one of Canada’s top cosmetic surgeons. A little later on, in the next hour, we are gonna be joined by Ann Kaplan. I hesitate to say your wife. I want to say, you know, your partner, your better … she’s so much, right? She’s so big and she’s so vibrant, and we saw her earlier. She’s gonna be coming in. She’s got a great book out.
Dr. Stephen M: Yeah, she’s put out this book, How to Be Successful In Spite of Him, with the Him crossed out, and Yourself under that. So, as Dr. Him married to this amazing woman, I read this over Christmas. And I, to be honest, she does so many things. MBA, PhD, amazing mother, wife. Runs a big business. I didn’t even know she wrote it, and then she said-
Barb DiGiulio: Oh, you’re kidding.
Dr. Stephen M: I didn’t know she was working on it. Or, maybe she told me, but I wasn’t as attentive from an auditory perspective.
Barb DiGiulio: But it’s not like she was taking time every day, “This is my time to write.”
Dr. Stephen M: No, not at all. She just wrote it.
Barb DiGiulio: She managed to get it done with everything else.
Dr. Stephen M: I read it over Christmas, and I have to say, as someone who is reasonably successful, I found little things that I said, “Yeah, right on. That’s kind of what I’m doing to make my life more purposeful.” Yeah.
Barb DiGiulio: Mm-hmm (affirmative), there’s a lot of that in there, and I can’t wait to bring her in. We’re gonna be talking about that. In terms of cosmetic surgery and procedures, you were mentioning earlier that there’s so many more options now that are noninvasive.
Dr. Stephen M: Correct.
Barb DiGiulio: What are some of the more popular things people are doing, and are they becoming more popular with Millennials getting into the game?
Dr. Stephen M: Yeah. So, you can divide that into, what are people doing? Divide it into men and women.
Barb DiGiulio: Okay.
Dr. Stephen M: And young and old. What is old? Well, young, let’s say 35 and under, so the young Millennial generation. Injectables, Botox, fillers, which stops wrinkles and deflation in its tracks, creates the lips that maybe you didn’t inherit. And then skincare, sun protection factor. And then for stubborn pockets of fat, despite diet and exercise, destructive fat technologies like cool sculpting and sculpture, and body effects vanquish the things that kill fat. And then unwanted hair is still very, very popular. So, laser hair removal of various hairy zones that we don’t want to be hairy.
Barb DiGiulio: Okay.
Dr. Stephen M: And then the oddball things, like we have a special microwave applicator for your armpit that kills sweating forever.
Barb DiGiulio: Really? Yeah?
Dr. Stephen M: Yes. We have a little suction cup device that we put on your bum, under local, and it divides dimples. So, cellulite divider, and that’s called the Cellfina. And we’ve got all these cool little devices we can plop all over the place to lift and firm breasts, to smoothen cellulite, to melt fat, to tighten skin, and to lift and tighten the face. So, I’m just quite astounded at what we can do without surgery. And having said that, there’s still a lot of face lifts, that’s common.
Nose jobs, that’s always in the top five things. Breast augment, perennially one of the most common things women do, and liposuction. There was 1.1 million liposuctions in North America last year. It’s the most common elective procedure, it’s more common than a gallbladder. And so yeah, surgery is still alive and well. But again, 82% of all procedures, no risk, no surgery, no recovery.
Barb DiGiulio: So, we have a number of questions that our listeners have been texting in over the last couple of hours, and one person writes, “I am 56. I would like to do my smile lines, they are bad. What is the difference between fillers and Botox? Can you talk about general costs to start the process?”
Dr. Stephen M: Very, very common. So, deep, deep smile lines. Those are the smile lines on either side of your mouth. When you smile, they get deeper, and sometimes they just make you look like a bit of a hound dog, and they can communicate with the lines below your mouth called the marionette lines. And in general, soft tissue fillers, products like Juvederm or Restalyne, the most commonly known, are injected. And these are like soft gels, sugar gels, and they hangout in your fat when injected with a small microcannula, and they distend and plump. So, they plump up your smile and they fill it from below. It’s done in about 10 minutes, relatively little downtime. And done appropriately, it will soften by about 80%, a smile line. And so that’s called a soft tissue filler. That’ll last you about a year, and it costs between $500 and $700 a syringe. And one syringe usually softens your smile lines on both sides.
Botox doesn’t plump, it doesn’t fill, it relaxes animated muscles. So, your frown lines, the number 11s between your eyebrows, most common. Crow’s feet on the side, worry lines on your forehead, wrinkles under your eyes, barcodes, smoker lines above your lips. This is where Botox can soften animation to smoothen wrinkles, and it does so by weakening the muscle that causes it.
Barb DiGiulio: Have I heard or read something about Botox being used for excessive perspiration, too?
Dr. Stephen M: Absolutely, and so Botox works on different kinds of muscle. These are the skeletal muscles that we control. We think, “That was a dumb comment,” and we frown. And so we can relax those frown muscles, but it also works on non skeletal muscle, muscles we don’t control. So, if you think of your armpits as a bunch of little glands that push out sweat whenever you sweat, but it needs muscle to excrete that sweat. By injecting Botox, small, diluted amounts just in the armpit, within three days you don’t sweat. I’m talking 100%, virtually 100% reduction, from nine to 12 months. So, if you’re really vexed by one of those, just you’re a real bad sweater and you stain shirts and it’s malodorous and it’s just ruining your life. And then you’ve tried deodorants, antiperspirants, everything, Botox can give you one year of relief.
Barb DiGiulio: You know, if there are people who go through that, that’s got to impact their life day to day.
Dr. Stephen M: Oh, it’s huge. Huge, life changing event. These people often have sweaty palms, sweaty soles of their feet. They’ll perspire from the rim of their hair, the verge of the hair. And so a little Botox, palm of your hand and in your hair sweating areas and in your armpit, turns you into a normal, socially engaged person.
Barb DiGiulio: Wow. 416-872-1010. Text us at 7-1010. Somebody is writing, and I don’t know if this is your department. Can you please ask the doctor if he can get rid of plantar warts?
Dr. Stephen M: That’s a dermatologic concern, and at SpaMedica we do have a dermatologist that comes in about once a week. And plantar warts are generally very, very common. Caused by a virus in the skin, and it replicates these annoying warts. And generally, we can use chemical means to dissolve them. You can use a radiofrequency point device that hypercathexes or burns them off, that’s the most common treatment. And we even have a laser that cuts off the blood supply once fired at the wart, and the wart will fall off. So, either chemically burn it, or we heat it and it’s removed.
Barb DiGiulio: Right, ’cause this person says liquid nitrogen has not worked for them. Is that …
Dr. Stephen M: And one of the techniques may not work, and so you might have to step it up to the [inaudible 00:16:07], which is the most aggressive form of burning them off. But liquid nitrogen, very commonly used by medical dermatology. Salicylic acid, you can still get salicylic acid at the pharmacy, non prescriptive, and you can slowly peel them off.
Barb DiGiulio: That reminds me. We have to take a break, but I’m just jotting down. I need to ask you about this vampire facial business, okay? That, and whether Kim Kardashian has or hasn’t. ‘Cause she says she hasn’t, and I’m also wondering, do we really need to know?
Dr. Stephen M: I think that’s a very good answer, and I think I would ask what Kim Kardashian hasn’t done.
Barb DiGiulio: Okay. We’ll talk about that, and we’ve got some people calling in. Hang in, Dr. Mulholland is here. 416-872-1010. You’re listening to The Night Side.
Speaker 1: Listen to The Night Side anywhere your day takes you with the iHeartRadio app for your mobile or tablet. Download it for free right now at NewsTalk1010.com. This is The Night Side with Barb DiGiulio on NewsTalk 1010.
Barb DiGiulio: Welcome back to the show. Great to have you along. Dr. Stephen Mulholland is here, he is the founder of SpaMedica, one of Canada’s top cosmetic plastic surgeons, and we’re answering questions talking about all kinds of different procedures. We’ve got someone, Dr. Mulholland, who’s been hanging on for quite a bit to ask you something, and it’s Julie. Welcome to the show, Julie.
Julie: Can you hear me?
Barb DiGiulio: Yes, we can. Go ahead with your question.
Julie: Okay. So, my question is, do you perform nonsurgical rhinoplasty?
Dr. Stephen M: Great question. It’s Julie, correct? Now, Julie, do you have a bridge bump?
Dr. Stephen M: A bridge scoop, a crooked nose, a plunging tip, or a bulbus tip? Which of those variants bug you?
Julie: I’m calling on behalf of myself and my friend. I have a tip, and she has I think a bump.
Dr. Stephen M: Okay. So, sometimes tips, when you smile, they can plunge, or the tip is too broad and it’s kind of button nosed, and not as cute as when you were young. So, we can use soft tissue fillers, you’re exactly right. Usually hyaluronic acid sugar gels, like the Juvederm, Restalyne family, and we can inject them above and below the bump. We can support a plunging tip, make it look a little narrower. Even crooked noses or bridge scoops, so, those are the four most common variants that you see. Bulbus tips, plunging tips, bridge bumps, and bridge scoops. And you’d be quite amazed what about a five minute injection procedure will do. And in fact, the procedure is called the five minute nose job.
Dr. Stephen M: Yeah. If you go, let’s say you go on YouTube, look up five minute nose job, you’ll see yours truly who has been on the Today show doing it, on Cityline, on Breakfast Television, where I take a bump or a plunging tip, do a little injection, and voila. It’s beautiful because you get an immediate results. Now, it only lasts about a year, Julie, so that’s kind of a drag.
But a lot of women I see, I do a lot of nose jobs that are surgical, but they’ll come in and we’ll try a nonsurgical injection so they can live with it for a year. Do some selfies, get some pictures, and just kind of have a feel for what it’s like without a bump or without a tip that doesn’t plunge, and then we can do some computer imaging and she can explore, or he can explore, a surgical option. So, it’s a great let’s try it on for size option, and it’s a great option if you’re afraid of surgery.
Julie: Great, and what’s the cost?
Dr. Stephen M: Excellent question. The most average injection rhinoplasty, five minute nose job, requires one syringe of Juvederm Voluma or Restalyne, and that’s gonna cost you about $800. Now, if you’ve got a really big bump or scoop, you need two syringes, it might be $1200, and that’ll give you up to 18 months of correction.
Barb DiGiulio: And that’s compared to how much for a nose-
Dr. Stephen M: A surgical nose job in the city is about $10,000 on average, yeah.
Barb DiGiulio: Okay. It’s a good way to try it out.
Dr. Stephen M: It’s a good try it on for size, for sure. And if you’ve got a big event, I have some girls who come in and say, “Oh jeez, I wish I had seen you two years ago.” ‘Cause they’ve got a wedding coming up that’s in three or four months, it’s the only thing you can do when you have a big event. ‘Cause you really need a good year to recover from a nose job to get the final result.
Julie: Wow, great news. And the last question is, does age pose an issue or have anything to do with it in terms of elasticity?
Dr. Stephen M: Yeah, that’s a good question. The older you get, the more lax your nose gets. And in fact, some women come in and say, “Dr. Mull, my nose is growing. What’s with that?” And I say, “Well, you know, it’s probably not growing. What’s happening is your cheeks are shrinking, and you’re postmenopausal deflation, like airing out a balloon in your cheeks, and your nose looks relatively bigger.” But the elasticity can get a little lax as you get older, and sometimes if you do, let’s say you’ve had some acne or some other changes on your nose, you might need to do a little bit more than one syringe to plump up the skin. But in general, even older noses in their 60s and 70s can benefit from an injection nose job.
Julie: Okay, thank you so much.
Barb DiGiulio: All right, Julie. Thanks a lot for the call. I think that’s really interesting because I see sometimes people online, once they’ve finally had this procedure that they’ve always wanted, they suddenly don’t like the way they look or they’re not sure about it.
Dr. Stephen M: That’s an excellent point. And I just have to say, you know, it being Valentine’s Day, that sometimes patients, particularly women in our culture for a number of reasons, are motivated by the wrong reason. They’re motivated by maybe keeping a guy that they should toss to the curb.
Barb DiGiulio: Right.
Dr. Stephen M: Or trying to get back at a guy who’s not worth it, or just trying to engage a guy on some dating app where you’re judged by right and left swipes, and appearances become almost too important in relationships. And so doing it for the wrong reason and then suddenly the relationship isn’t saved ’cause it wasn’t meant to be, and you look in the mirror and say, “What have I done? I’ve changed my look for someone else.” So, I’m a big fan of always making sure, when I’m meeting with patients, they’re doing it for the right reason. They’re doing it for them. They’re doing it because they’ve thought about the options, they’ve tried nonsurgical techniques perhaps, and they have a good sense of who they want to be, and they’re not doing it for the wrong reason.
It’s not gonna get you off antidepressants. A procedure is not gonna save a failing marriage. It’s not gonna get you the raise that you wished you got. It’s gonna give you a different look, and you have to be content with that look.
Barb DiGiulio: I mean, I’ve always heard, when you breakup, don’t cut your hair. Don’t change you hair color. So, then do not make a big, major cosmetic surgery change. That would be huge.
Dr. Stephen M: Yeah. Well, wait at least a month for breast augment for sure.
Barb DiGiulio: Here is Shelley. Hi Shelley, welcome to the show.
Barb DiGiulio: Hi, go ahead.
Shelley: I’m 61, and I’ve been noticing my chin is starting to droop. And yes, I am a little bit overweight, but I’m trying to do neck exercises. I’m just wondering, what kind of procedure and what would the cost be to-
Barb DiGiulio: It’s a great question. Do neck exercises even work? You know, I always wonder about that.
Dr. Stephen M: Shelley, which skin? Is it skin of the face and neck? Skin of the belly, skin of the thigh, or just all your skin in general?
Barb DiGiulio: She said chin.
Dr. Stephen M: Of the chin.
Barb DiGiulio: Sagging chin.
Dr. Stephen M: Okay. Again, this is a situation, Shelley, where you probably have a little bit of fat under the skin, and it’s kind of wobbly.
Dr. Stephen M: So, it’s kind of like a chubby chicken neck or turkey neck. And in general, what I recommend is if you’re really thinking of losing weight and you’re 20, 25, 30 pounds from where you think you can really be, don’t waste your money on a procedure that removes the fat. Because if you lose weight, you’re gonna have more excess skin. And to be honest, I think that necks looks better a bit chubby and full than deflated and all saggy like a turkey neck. And so there are some procedures that will kill the fat. CoolSculpt mini, SculpSure submental. These are nonsurgical procedures that will kill fat, but they don’t always address your skin adequately. And you’ve also probably heard about Kybella, it’s a needle injection where the product we inject, Kybella, kills the fat. But if you have a little bit of loose skin, you’re gonna have to do a skin tightening procedure.
And so we have some internal probes we could put under the skin and melt the fat and tighten your skin at the same time. It’s under local anesthesia. It’s something called Neck Tight, works very well for that. All of these procedures don’t require a scalpel, they don’t require any cutting. But if you came to me and said, “Dr. Mulholland, money is not an object. I don’t mind doing a procedure under local, I don’t mind a scalpel.” Then, a good old fashioned neck lift, just a neck lift where the fat is removed and we pull up the skin and take out the excess and hide the scar behind your ear, is probably, at 61, gonna be your best option.
And you know, I do see some patients like yourself who waste some money doing things that give a little bit of an improvement. But, you know, you’ve spend $3000 or $4000 and you didn’t get what you wanted. Usually, a good, old fashioned neck lift which is gonna be upwards of $10,000 is going to give you that right angle neck you had when you were maybe 40, 45 years old, and it’s probably your best investment.
Shelley: Okay. Thank you very much, sir.
Barb DiGiulio: Shelley, thanks for the call. We do have to take a break. Up until what age do you … do you have people of all ages?
Dr. Stephen M: Sure do. I have to say that it’s not chronological anymore, it’s more physiologic. I have some patients come to me that are 65, and they’re terrible. I mean, they’re smokers, they’re diabetics, they’re unwell. They’ve had a heart stent and they’ve had a stroke, and they wonder if they can get a face lift? No, you need life support.
Barb DiGiulio: Wow.
Dr. Stephen M: But then you’ve got 85 year olds who are super fit and very healthy, and yeah, they can do procedures, ’cause a lot of the facial procedures especially are done under local anesthesia. So, I’ve done more mini lifts and procedures on octogenarians in the last few years than I did in my first 20 years of practice. These are healthy 80 year olds that are coming in saying, “You know, I’m active, I’m on boards. I want to look great with my grandkids, and I want to do a little procedure.” And as long as they’re medically well, no heart disease, and they can tolerate local anesthesia, there’s many things you can do well into your 80s.
Barb DiGiulio: Fantastic. Dr. Stephen Mulholland is here, and when we come back, we are going to be joined by Ann Kaplan. We’re gonna talk about How to Be Successful in Spite of Yourself, her new book. And she’s a treat, you’re gonna love it. You’re listening to The Night Side.
Welcome back to The Night Side. Great to have you along, and happy Valentine’s Day. And look at us, how lucky we are. Dr. Stephen Mulholland is here with his Valentine Ann Kaplan. So generous of you guys to come in on Valentine’s Day, I really do appreciate it. Dr. Mulholland, I know we set up for you to come in, and then we reached back out and said, “Are you sure you’re okay to come in on Valentine’s Day?” And you said, “Yes.” That was your date night, and-
Dr. Stephen M: As long as I can bring my Valentine.
Barb DiGiulio: That’s right. And Ann Kaplan, welcome back. You’ve been here before, and now you have this terrific book, How to Be Successful in Spite of Yourself. Congratulations on the book.
Ann Kaplan: Thank you very much. I’m really enjoying promoting it and getting all the responses, so thank you.
Barb DiGiulio: I hear you were just, was it North Carolina?
Ann Kaplan: I was in Charlotte, North Carolina, and I was stuck there for 36 hours.
Barb DiGiulio: Wow, because of the weather here.
Ann Kaplan: I could not get out because of the weather in Toronto, I could not get out. I tried three different airlines, I could not get out.
Barb DiGiulio: Love the book, and I want to just start with the title. I think this is really interesting because How to Be Successful in Spite of Yourself, people have ideas about what it is to be successful, and what it is to be happy. And I find that a lot of people I talk to, it’s almost like they have to get out of their own way.
Ann Kaplan: You’re absolutely right. And we look at life and we say, “Gee, I can’t do that because my marriage is not good or my husband wouldn’t like it, or I have to look after the kids,” or something. We have to do all those kind of things, but we need to get rid of the excuses, and I know that it’s difficult. You pile on different things you need to do, but we need to say to ourselves we are the ones who are gonna make this happen. And even though we have a full plate, or even though we might’ve come out of a bad marriage or we might be alone or we’ve had a difficult background, we need to be the ones that take control and just move forward, get out of our own way as you say, and take control to find the success in our lives.
Barb DiGiulio: I imagine people look at you, you’re very successful. You’ve done so many things. Well, you’re a successful business person. You’ve done TV, you’re a writer, you are educated. Do people ever look at you and think it’s come easy for you?
Ann Kaplan: I think almost everyone I meet, when they don’t know me, or even when they do know me. I have one of my closest girlfriends says, “Well, everything comes easy for you,” just what you just said. And I was like, “You’ve got to be kidding. I work so, so hard.” But I do it with happiness. And if you look at success, it’s not necessarily about education. It’s not necessarily about money or marriage or anything, it’s being able to live the way you want to live. And for me, living with joy in my heart, that’s enough to be successful. I live happy, and that’s nothing to do with money, and nothing to do with education, and nothing to do with being in business. It’s just living with that joy. And that, to me, is success. So, success is how you define it as well.
Barb DiGiulio: I think something that I come across quite a bit that some people fail to see is that people who are happy still have bad days, still have adversity, still have stuff to deal with. As you have said in the book, still have that crap that comes into your life. What is it about people like you, I think I’m like that too, that people think, well none of that bad stuff ever happens to you?
Ann Kaplan: And I do think it happens to everyone. You cannot stop the crap that comes into your life. But when it does and you wake up and you just feel awful, you know that you’re going to get through it. You know there’s going to be a better day even though you’re right at the bottom and you’re feeling horrible. Whatever is happening in your life, you know you will make it through. And so that, I think, is the difference when you have dealt with adversity and you’ve gotten through it and come out on top of it, because you didn’t think you could come out on top, that you can find your way through life if you know that you are the one that is in control and you can get through it.
Barb DiGiulio: You are very candid in this book. It’s a self help book that reads also as a memoir, and you talk about a lot of painful stuff when you were growing up. Was that ever difficult for you? Not to live that, of course it was, to decide to share that and be that open with everybody?
Ann Kaplan: It was very … and the book, even though it sounds like it’s a memoir, I use sort of points in my life that things that have happened so someone can relate and say, “Hey, she didn’t just start with loads of money. She didn’t just do this, it didn’t land on her lap.” And I also bring up the very, very difficult things that happened in my past that someone can look at it and say, “Okay, she actually has gone through something, and I can relate to that.” It might not be the same thing that someone else has gone through, but I needed to put a human element, an honest, truthful element in there that said, “Hey, I got through this, and this is what I did.”
And I also take it from an educated standpoint, from a point where I have studied spirituality, that I can say there’s different places I’ve taken it from. And yeah, you know what? I’ve lived through some tough stuff, and I got out on top of that, meaning I got out and I’m living a happy life.
Barb DiGiulio: One of the things I found very interesting when you talk about your different levels of education and you did an MBA and you got your Doctorate, is that, I don’t think you put it this way, so these are my words. But I felt like oh, she has had that imposter syndrome, too, where you feel like somebody’s gonna realize I’m not really right at doing this. And then you discover through doing it that why wouldn’t you? And you did do well, and you excelled.
Ann Kaplan: Yeah, and when you say impostor syndrome, at points I’ve thought when I’ve gone up and done public speaking or been in the public eye, which has been quite a bit, is someone’s going to discover how absolutely normal and scared I am. Or else, how absolutely I’m just the same as them. And when I realize that, and I do realize that all the time, is that I’m just the same as anyone else, and anyone else is just the same as me. We all walk into a room, and I mean not a physical room, but we walk into life, we are faced with things that we are all the same. We’re coming from the same box of crayons where we draw our life, and we’re not much different.
Some of us have to start out on a very more difficult platform than others. There is sadness, there is evil, there are places where we’re born into with more challenges. But we look at some very, very, very, successful people that have overcome challenges, and great challenges to go on and live a happy life and be successful, even more than you can imagine if they didn’t start from those challenges.
Barb DiGiulio: You know, you write, there are so many, I mean, there are just great pointers all throughout the book, but one of the things is, “You are what you think.”
Ann Kaplan: Yes.
Barb DiGiulio: Can you expand on that a bit for people who maybe don’t buy into that?
Ann Kaplan: Well, we live in our own reality. And when you can realize that you are the one that is in control of who you are and how you’re perceived, when you realize that you are the one that can make change and you can control your own life, you can control everything around you. Because it sounds almost hocus, it’s hard to talk about it a bit out of the book, but it’s your in control of your whole environment. And when you realize that you’re in control, you can change your life and you can make your life happy, and then the next thing, you are happy. You’re in control of it, and everything. How you’re perceived.
Because if you understand that the person next to you, what they think of you doesn’t really matter, it’s how you perceive what they’re thinking of you, then you can be in control of that. If you can say, “It doesn’t really matter to me what you think,” and you actually believe that, you can be in control.
Barb DiGiulio: We’d be so much better if we stopped even trying to think about or wonder what other people are thinking about us.
Ann Kaplan: Absolutely. If we’re not going in and you’re gonna say, “I’m just going to say what I feel and I’m gonna be what I feel, and whatever you think of me, it doesn’t matter,” you have so much freedom. Because if you live off a value set, a set of values that you want to be and live by, if you live off that and you don’t care what someone else thinks, then you are in complete control of your destiny and your life.
Barb DiGiulio: It’s a terrific book, I love it. It’s available on your website, and I’m assuming, well, you tell us.
Ann Kaplan: Well, it’s available at Indigo, it’s available in airports.
Barb DiGiulio: All right.
Ann Kaplan: It’s available at Barnes and Noble, in Amazon, it’s available everywhere. And also, it’s being translated in Israel into Hebrew, and it’s available in the U.K., Australia, it has gone quite more global. So, I’m very, very excited about the opportunity to be here, and hopefully somebody can find the book and they can follow me on AnnKaplin_OwnIt, and they can find the book on any of those platforms. It’s How to Be Successful In Spite of Yourself.
Barb DiGiulio: It’s terrific, and one question for Dr. Muhholland. Is it true you took her to Kentucky Fried Chicken for your first date?
Dr. Stephen M: It was one of the very new high end walkthroughs.
Barb DiGiulio: Oh, right.
Dr. Stephen M: It was quite classy. Normally, I would’ve been a Golden Griddle guy, but this was a Kentucky Fried opportunity.
Ann Kaplan: I’m a vegan. I was a vegan back then, and I’m still a vegan. And he actually stood there and said, “Just order.” And I said, “Don’t put the chicken in with the wrap. Just leave the chicken out.” And they said, “No, no, no, we can’t do that. You have to have the chicken in the wrap.” And Stephen just looked at me like, “Just order it and take the chicken out.” You can’t have the chicken touching.
Dr. Stephen M: I wasn’t sure in 1998 and ’99 what a vegan was. I thought it was some, maybe a Christianity or something, but …
Ann Kaplan: You took me to a walk in Kentucky Fried Chicken on our first date, Stephen. It doesn’t matter if you knew I was a vegan or not, you don’t take someone on their first date to Kentucky Fried Chicken.
Dr. Stephen M: I think you need to create realistic expectations in all relationships.
Barb DiGiulio: And here we are all these years later. Thank you both so much for spending your Valentine’s Day here. Terrific stuff, thank you.
Dr. Stephen M: Thank you very much, Barbara.
Barb DiGiulio: Ann Kaplan, Dr. Stephen Mulholland. You’re listening to The Night Side.